[ This is the sort of wound that can't close or heal. It's festered and rotted after thousands upon thousands of years, spreading across every surface of his body until it becomes all of him. Kim Dokja will not permit himself to recover. This self-inflicted punishment is the retaliation that he deserves because no one else will give it to him.
... And he doesn't know if he can survive more than that.
It feels like the air's been pressed out of his lungs as his eyes sting and his throat burns. This isn't the sort of confrontation he wants to face, but he's worn down, made weak, and he feels his makeshift conviction collapse from within. ]
If you get hurt because of me, then I'll really be nothing more than a monster.
[ His voice comes out hoarse, small, afraid. Defeated. Dokja had tried... oh, how he had tried to maintain his distance when he'd first arrived to that world called Horos, convincing himself that he wouldn't grow close to anyone in fear of causing the usual destruction he leaves in his wake at every turn, but what had happened? Eventually, one person, then another, then even more than that had wiggled their way into a heart that had finally learned to love, and it had been so easy to turn his gaze away and tell himself it wasn't anything to grow concerned with.
But now, faced with the truth and reality of the situation, faced with one of the very few people he has left in this new world, the understanding that he could lose it all a second time because of him becomes too real. ]
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... And he doesn't know if he can survive more than that.
It feels like the air's been pressed out of his lungs as his eyes sting and his throat burns. This isn't the sort of confrontation he wants to face, but he's worn down, made weak, and he feels his makeshift conviction collapse from within. ]
If you get hurt because of me, then I'll really be nothing more than a monster.
[ His voice comes out hoarse, small, afraid. Defeated. Dokja had tried... oh, how he had tried to maintain his distance when he'd first arrived to that world called Horos, convincing himself that he wouldn't grow close to anyone in fear of causing the usual destruction he leaves in his wake at every turn, but what had happened? Eventually, one person, then another, then even more than that had wiggled their way into a heart that had finally learned to love, and it had been so easy to turn his gaze away and tell himself it wasn't anything to grow concerned with.
But now, faced with the truth and reality of the situation, faced with one of the very few people he has left in this new world, the understanding that he could lose it all a second time because of him becomes too real. ]