[ Dokja is truly the most cringe and free out of everyone involved here, though Eustace is trying his best to take baby steps to catch up.
It'll never get old watching the everchanging landscape of Dokja's emotions and how lightning-quick he can go from looking elated to absolutely unimpressed. (Dokja isn't the only one in the house who stares when he thinks others aren't looking.) A stark contrast to how he knows he looks, which makes it all the more interesting.
The reluctant admittance has him smiling, the arm still loosely wrapped around Dokja's waist tightening. He thinks for a moment, then pulls both of them down so that they're no longer half-propped up against the headboard but lying down proper in the bed. It's cuddle time now. ]
I like you too.
[ It's easier to say than he expects, the words coming out with barely a hitch instead of getting trapped in his throat like he would have expected. (Then again, it's not the other l-word, so maybe the fact that he can say this now isn't all that impressive.) He doesn't think on the reasons why too much, once again shoving all complicated thoughts aside so he can bask in the simple pleasure of the moment. ]
I won't change anything. You don't need to change anything either.
[ Because Eustace likes him the way he is. :/ Gay. ]
Dokja goes down easily, happy to stay where he is as long as Eustace is right beside him. He basks in the warmth radiating off of Eustace, different from the warmth that comes from Springstar's suns. Here, at least, this warm comfort is only for him, and there's a selfish pleasure that he takes from that knowledge. So often has he gone without, and now with so much fulfilled, it's both soothing and painfully anxiety-inducing.
He'll have to do whatever he can to keep this.
And then his thoughts are broken into when the easy admission slips past Eustace's lips, and Dokja is left frozen where is, instinctively tensing as if expecting a denial to follow. When it doesn't, when all he's left with are gentle words meant to reassure him, Dokja is at a loss for words.
But it isn't panic. It's surprise. It's the twist in his gut, the pounding of his heart, the way he has to bite down on his tongue from trying to make a joke in an effort to avoid the candidness of this moment. It's the way he has to fight back a stupid smile at hearing such simple words that have probably been spoken to others hundreds of times, but never to him, and the way that he doesn't feel the urge to run for once in his life. In the end, he hides his face against Eustace's shoulder, tension slowly fading as Dokja forces himself to relax.
Just a second later, he finally responds. ]
Me too, [ he says quietly, voice muffled. ] I like you... a lot.
[ More than he'll ever know or understand how to properly convey. ]
[ There'd never been any expectation behind his words, uttered freely and genuinely. Love and affectoin had never been shackles for him, only a source of strength, and he has no plans of changing that now either for himself or for Dokja. It's enough to simply say it, to be able to voice his feelings aloud without fear of rejection.
So when the reply comes, soft and muffled against his shoulder, he's caught off-guard, whole body momentarily going still from surprise. It would be less surprising coming from anyone else but Dokja, with his habit of avoiding and deflecting and running away from everything that makes him feel remotely uncomfortable. Though maybe the sentiment itself shouldn't be so much of a surprise after how closely Dokja has stuck to his side ever since they'd returned from the Great Tree. Still, there's something about hearing it vocalized aloud that fills him with a weird sort of giddiness, caught between fierce joy and a sudden paralyzing fear at the reminder of how much he has to lose now.
As usual, it's easier to channel his feelings into action instead of words. (Not like they really need words anyway, when the invisible threads of their Aspect have always bound them together.) Rather than say anything, he tightens his hold on Dokja, pulling him in close like the world might end at any moment. Tomorrow they'll have to get up, go to work, return to the harsh reality wherein the fate of the world (and their worlds) lies in their hands. Today they can pretend that it's just the two of them, their biggest problem being the question of who hogs the sheets at night.
i really gave you a tag of nothing but introspection i'm so sorry, we can wrap this up and move on ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
It'll never get old watching the everchanging landscape of Dokja's emotions and how lightning-quick he can go from looking elated to absolutely unimpressed. (Dokja isn't the only one in the house who stares when he thinks others aren't looking.) A stark contrast to how he knows he looks, which makes it all the more interesting.
The reluctant admittance has him smiling, the arm still loosely wrapped around Dokja's waist tightening. He thinks for a moment, then pulls both of them down so that they're no longer half-propped up against the headboard but lying down proper in the bed. It's cuddle time now. ]
I like you too.
[ It's easier to say than he expects, the words coming out with barely a hitch instead of getting trapped in his throat like he would have expected. (Then again, it's not the other l-word, so maybe the fact that he can say this now isn't all that impressive.) He doesn't think on the reasons why too much, once again shoving all complicated thoughts aside so he can bask in the simple pleasure of the moment. ]
I won't change anything. You don't need to change anything either.
[ Because Eustace likes him the way he is. :/ Gay. ]
no subject
Dokja goes down easily, happy to stay where he is as long as Eustace is right beside him. He basks in the warmth radiating off of Eustace, different from the warmth that comes from Springstar's suns. Here, at least, this warm comfort is only for him, and there's a selfish pleasure that he takes from that knowledge. So often has he gone without, and now with so much fulfilled, it's both soothing and painfully anxiety-inducing.
He'll have to do whatever he can to keep this.
And then his thoughts are broken into when the easy admission slips past Eustace's lips, and Dokja is left frozen where is, instinctively tensing as if expecting a denial to follow. When it doesn't, when all he's left with are gentle words meant to reassure him, Dokja is at a loss for words.
But it isn't panic. It's surprise. It's the twist in his gut, the pounding of his heart, the way he has to bite down on his tongue from trying to make a joke in an effort to avoid the candidness of this moment. It's the way he has to fight back a stupid smile at hearing such simple words that have probably been spoken to others hundreds of times, but never to him, and the way that he doesn't feel the urge to run for once in his life. In the end, he hides his face against Eustace's shoulder, tension slowly fading as Dokja forces himself to relax.
Just a second later, he finally responds. ]
Me too, [ he says quietly, voice muffled. ] I like you... a lot.
[ More than he'll ever know or understand how to properly convey. ]
no subject
So when the reply comes, soft and muffled against his shoulder, he's caught off-guard, whole body momentarily going still from surprise. It would be less surprising coming from anyone else but Dokja, with his habit of avoiding and deflecting and running away from everything that makes him feel remotely uncomfortable. Though maybe the sentiment itself shouldn't be so much of a surprise after how closely Dokja has stuck to his side ever since they'd returned from the Great Tree. Still, there's something about hearing it vocalized aloud that fills him with a weird sort of giddiness, caught between fierce joy and a sudden paralyzing fear at the reminder of how much he has to lose now.
As usual, it's easier to channel his feelings into action instead of words. (Not like they really need words anyway, when the invisible threads of their Aspect have always bound them together.) Rather than say anything, he tightens his hold on Dokja, pulling him in close like the world might end at any moment. Tomorrow they'll have to get up, go to work, return to the harsh reality wherein the fate of the world (and their worlds) lies in their hands. Today they can pretend that it's just the two of them, their biggest problem being the question of who hogs the sheets at night.
i really gave you a tag of nothing but introspection i'm so sorry, we can wrap this up and move on ]